How to Create a 'Magical Connection' With Your Prospect
Have you ever been sitting in a restaurant talking with someone and the two of you are so engaged in conversation that it is as though you are the only two people in the restaurant? Better yet - the only two people on the Planet?
How about...
"We're just on the same wavelength" or "I feel like I've known you all my life" - these are phrases that are typically stated when people are trying to describe this magical connection.
Could all these have a common denominator? I believe so. It's that two (or more) people are talking with the same assertiveness level. The word assertive means the force a person uses to make their opinion known.
This is where art and finesse come into my otherwise systematic approach. So when you're presenting your product or your company, how forcefully you communicate to your prospect is what I'm referring to with "your assertiveness level."
In another way of looking at this, picture that you have infinite volume in your voice and you get to choose how loud you will tell your prospect about your company - this is your assertiveness level. If you scream you will probably be using too much assertiveness. If you whisper you will probably be using not enough assertiveness.
If I were to blame only one thing for the less than perfect reputation of multi-level marketing I would blame using too much assertiveness. This subject begs to be understood. I explained a small portion in "Professional Inviter" - but as a presenter you need more skills.
Some people can handle a lot of assertiveness being pushed their way and some cannot! What happens when someone cannot handle much assertiveness? They back away and withdraw from you. What happens when your assertiveness level is not enough for the prospect? They will be bored with you as you lack the conviction they require and they'll walk away from you. Therefore it is critical that your assertiveness level be approximately the same as your prospects'.
There are several methods or strategies to raise or lower your assertiveness towards another person. As I go through this list, keep in mind that I'm teaching you this from two different perspectives - one, I want you to see how you can raise or lower your assertiveness and the second reason I'm teaching this to you is for you to be able to tell what level of assertiveness your prospect is at.
Here are the main methods you can use to adjust your assertiveness level:
Voice volume:
If you speak very loudly, you can easily be too assertive. Speaking very softly, that is, not quite heard by your prospect - will result in you using too little assertiveness. Neither of these are optimum.
Body language:
Your body language includes how you stand or sit. The closer you stand to the prospect the more assertiveness you are using. The further away you stand from the prospect the less assertive you are. Shoulders squared to the prospect - more assertive, talk with your hands - more assertive, lean back when you talk - less assertive and even the color of your suit makes you more or less assertive!
Facial expression:
A strong face with head tilted up with no smile will have more assertiveness than a cowardly look with head tilted down. We all know how to look mean, angry, happy, sad or surprised - we all know these emotions we wear on our faces... well, each of these contributes to your assertiveness level.
Direct or dispersed words:
This has to do with the aggregate number of words you use to say something. If someone asks you a question and you reply, "NO", it's much more assertive than if you were to answer, "Well I see your point but I've not really seen that over the long term." Your answer is the same - no. But the assertiveness level is reduced or dispersed.
Timing:
There are many "time frames" you should be aware of when presenting. I will go into depth on this on the upcoming conference call. This one may explain why the prospect "was interested" and "now they're not" - what happened!?
Repetition:
Repetition is the number of times you repeat something or the frequency with which you repeat something in a given time frame.
Hopefully you can now see that there are several things that go into having or using the right amount of assertiveness. Please join me on the upcoming conference call (scheduled for Wednesday, October 22nd at 9 PM Eastern) and I will explain this very crucial subject for you in detail so you know how to adjust your own assertiveness to your prospect's easily.
I'd like to know what questions or comments you have about this topic. If you consider yourself "shy" - please tell me why. If you feel you sometimes "come on too strong" - please tell me why.
Leave your comments and questions at the end of this article at www.brilliantexchange.com and I will discuss them on the free training call:
http://www.brilliantexchange.com/MLMSuccessTips
Respectfully,
Tim Sales
P.S. Don't forget that to be a good presenter, you first have to be a good inviter. If you don't already have Professional Inviter, I urge you to get it now so you too can have results like these: "Since using the techniques espoused by Tim, my sponsor rate has increased to 70%. That's pretty good in my book." - Bruce Rouse
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About the Author: Tim Sales
Member Since: 10/08/2008
Company: First Class MLM Tools
Industry: MLM
Primary Web Site: http://www.FirstClassMLMTools.com
Twitter: timdsales


Welcom, Tim Sales!
Hi Tim,
I'm excited to see that such an illustrious member of the Network Marketing community is part of this social network! I love your "Professional Invitor" CD's.
I've heard the term "mirroring" used to describe the process of matching your prospect's level of assertiveness and their social style. In my dental practice, I learned "social styles" so that I could communicate better with my patients. Although I got really good at identifying the type of person I was dealing with, I wasn't always the greatest at matching them.
The easiest people to relate to are the ones who are most like us. I consider myself shy because I've never been good at starting conversations with strangers or making small talk.
If I have a lot in common with someone, piece of cake! But since I'm a fairly soft-spoken, analytical type, I struggle most with people who are loud, high-energy, and run on pure emotion. If I can keep up with them at all, I find it drains my energy!
Best,
Carolyn Schweitzer DDS