She expected help but her coach was smarter
Read More: My 7 year old daughter has some challenges. She’s considered “low tonal” which basically means she doesn’t have a lot of “tone” to her muscles. The Doctor told me flat out “It’s not that she won’t be able to do everything every other kid does but the amount of effort she has to expend to do it will be 2 to 4 times more.”
Together we do activities that will help her balance: climbing ladders, trees, snow mountains. We are taking horse back riding lessons, jumping on the trampoline and figure skating. All activities that will strengthen her muscles so she can walk up a flight of stairs using alternating feet.
I watched her figure skate the other day. She had fallen and getting up required balance. I knew she was tired, we’d had a fun weekend with lots of activity, she’d been at school all day. She was probably hungry and a bit cold. And she was just sitting on the ice when the instructor skated over to her.
She made several half hearted attempts to get up, falling back down each time. As I watched, silently encouraging her to get up, to keep going, she made a sincere effort and almost made it. That’s when the instructor reached out and gave her that little bit of support she needed to get her back on her blades. She happily skated away and finished her lesson not realizing the bigger lesson she learned there.
As I thought through what I had just witnessed I realized that little tableau was a visual of what a lot of network marketers do. Half hearted attempts to get up, sitting waiting for their mentor/coach or upline to reach down and give them a hand up. Depending on someone or something else for their success. That coach did exactly the right thing for my little girl. She helped her physically only after the attempt to get up was sincere. She was there to supply the right touch at the right moment !! My daughter learned something that day. Make a sincere effort and there will be people there to support, encourage and help you. Expect others to reach down and help you up and ultimately you haven’t progressed one iota.
Most network marketers are caught in the mindset of my upline will make me successful, my company will make me rich, all thought patterns that basically leave you sitting on the ice. Taking responsibility for you, for your financial security means you have to make a sincere effort, on your own, to stand up on those very thin blades. If you are currently relying on an MLM company to pay your children’s children you may want to consider that that is not taking responsibility for yourself. You are still relying on someone else to write your paycheque and what if you’ve only got one source writing out your cheques?
Peter Arnold summed it up neatly in a recent comment he made:
“SELF” BRANDING – My own recommendation is to NOT make our “MLM” be our BUSINESS. We’re leaving ourselves open to possible abuse + we’re far too vulnerable if that becomes our “primary” source of income. Instead, our MLM should be (an important) “part of” our overall BUSINESS ENTERPRISE ((diversification + multiple [Affiliate] income streams = both for personal protection and for higher profitability)).
PRODUCT – The “only” product you should ever lead with is ==> YOU (to build relationships “first”).
This is one of the reasons that some of the ‘pioneers’ of Internet Attraction Marketing (like Joe Schroder, Mike Dillard, Diane Hochman and Ann Sieg) all put SO much weight on the critical need for us to brand OURSELVES first – and not the companies / products / services, etc. It reduces the risk greatly – it makes us far less vulnerable.
You can read Peter’s full comment here on Betternetworker. He is a good source to tap into.
Think about that. As a commission sales person you are depending on the company. Is that really taking responsibility for you and your financial future?? Or could you be fired? Or could the company close its doors? Of course, both those scenarios could happen. The company owns the company, they make the rules, not you !
Consider diversification or monetization, complementary products and services to your current MLM. You’re using the tools anyways, might as well have a stream of income coming in from it.
To your success,
Joyce Penner
Views: 848
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Comments: 20 
About the Author: Joyce Penner
Member Since: 11/27/2008
I'm a Distributor For:: Life Force International
Other Company: Team Inc Pro
Industry: Communications and Networking
Primary Web Site: http://joycepenner.info/biz-blogging
Great Story ...
Great story Joyce.
I don't know why it reminded me of Cool Runnings.
The tie in to the industry was well timed and made sense.
I would have liked to see a few more pictures, but that's just me, i'm a very visual person. It's that damn HDADD - pictures just help me stay focused -lol!
Great job!
~Richard
Not just in MLM
Very good Joyce.
Isn't "sitting on the ice" a huge problem for so many people, not just in MLM, but in business and life in general?
Thanks for linking the problem to your daughter's lesson, a great example and congratulations to you and your daughter.
Peter
Fantastic lesson to be learned here
Very wise, indeed! I can't tell you how much time I wasted when I first got started in network marketing trying to help people who didn't want it, weren't ready for it, or simply had to do it "their way."
Now my time is more precious to me. My associates know the help is there if they want it, but I simply won't waste time with people who are content to "sit on the ice" or won't reach up to grab hold of my outstretched hand. Those people don't usually hang around in the industry very long anyway and lead to massive frustration if I invest too heavily (and unproductively) in them.
Dave
Inspiration
You are so right, that we have to take matters into our own hands. We do need to take action every day and no matter how many times we are rejected, we have to get back up. Not only does this develop our character but it also gives us inspiration instead of laying all our eggs in one basket to get creative and look for multiple income streams so we don't become disappointed if the company changes its rules.
MLM To Pay For Your Childrens Children
Most network marketers want to help pass down something for their children and are willing to work for it. It requires effort to develop the right kind of skills necessary to succeed in this industry. The time is now to start branding yourself. When I needed help I was willing to do the work but the information I was taught was the old school method that doesn't work in todays market. When people brand themselves people see them as an expert and will do business with them for sure...no sooner. The people that brand themselves on their own and ask for help doing it will no doubt be able to have a business that will give themselves a true residual income that so few enjoy in this business. Sometimes people think they don't have to go through what the successful pioneers went through. Great post!
EXCELLENT
Hi Joyce:
What a thoughtful and compelling story - thank you.
And thank you for letting us see that picture of your beautiful little girl.
My sense is that she will absolutely become an achiever, just like her mother, who understands what it takes, and will guide her.
The way you compare the idea of "taking responsibility for ourselves" - whether personally, or in our Home Businesses - is perfect.
I'm also humbled that you quoted me in your article - thank you for your confidence.
When it comes to "joining a Network Marketing business" - YES - we need to "insulate" ourselves from being so vulnerable - by taking RESPONSIBILITY.
It doesn't mean that we can't "love" our MLM - it simply means that we should never be "in love with" our MLM -- B-I-G difference.
RISK // P&Ps - For example, we need to at least "be aware" of the fact that the Legal Agreement we sign when we join an MLM (their Policies & Procedures) is a totally "one-sided" contract - where the "company" has all the control, the power and the ownership -- "not" the Rep (Distributor / Affiliate).
UNILEVEL Agreement - That is what this contract is - and the company calls all the shots - "they" can change and/or amend their P&P clauses at any time they choose to (for better or worse) - and there is nothing that anybody else can do to prevent that. Nada.
TAKING RESPONSIBILITY - As you so nicely wove into your article - WE therefore, need to take precautionary steps to take care of OURSELVES - such as...
SELF BRANDING + DIVERSIFICATION - You already touched on this in your article, so I won't elaborate here, other than to say there are "many" simple ways to do this, fortunately.
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Here's another KEY to consider...
AT ARM'S LENGTH - People should always, always embrace their MLM Distributorship from a "business" perspective - and hold themselves "at a distance" from their MLM - for their own protection (financially and emotionally) - just "in case" something should ever go terribly wrong (as it very often does!).
MLMs = VENDORS - I believe it's healthy to treat MLMs as strictly "vendors of very superior products & services" - for ourselves, our loved ones, our customers and our business partners.
ACCOUNTABILITY - And if (when) they "mess up" (for whatever reason) - we "fire" them -- and then, we "push and play" another one - as painful as that may sound.
TEAM HARMONY - Hopefully, this will "not" happen - but very frankly, it "does" happen all too often in our industry (wrongful terminations / lawsuits / negative changes to the comp plan, etc, etc, etc). IF people are building a cohesive, active and loyal TEAM of associates - based on sound business / financial / marketing / ethical principles - those partners (close friends) will "follow" them in a heart-beat, should this action become necessary.
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NOTE - What should be stressed here is - MLM companies "obviously" have the right to protect THEMSELVES via their P&Ps (and hence, the Reps, in most cases). Yes, there are many fine MLM companies out there, for sure - and my comments above are sincerely not meant to be "disrespectful" to these companies. And yes, an MLM "should" be (an important!) consideration for any Home Biz entrepreneur - but only if it becomes one "part of" their overall BUSINESS ENTERPRISE, in my own strong opinion.
MLM - The 'GOOD' - Let's never forget what "separates" the MLM business model from just about ANY OTHER on the planet => the opportunity for LEVERAGE + RESIDUAL INCOME ((to say nothing of the wonderful friendships // the chance for personal growth & leadership development // the opportunity to travel // much recognition // the thrill of helping others to achieve their own dreams and goals, etc)).
-- an MLM is the greatest FINANCIAL STRATEGY in North America - because of the huge TAX savings alone (says Sandy Botkin - famous tax attorney)
-- an MLM is the #1 RETIREMENT PLAN available anywhere - because it can create the best on-going PENSION (business annuity) on the planet -- IF built correctly (with the right foundation in place)
-- an MLM is perhaps the last bastion left, in the Free Enterprise System, where someone - without a high education - without a famous bloodline - without a large capital investment - can truly, achieve both TIME and FINANCIAL Freedom.
COMMON SENSE - Having said this - WE still need to take intelligent RESPONSIBILITY for "ourselves" - excercise caution - be professionals.
My own 03-cents worth (Canadian) on all this! :>)
Thanks for raising this important issue, Joyce.
Sincerely / Peter A.
Peter Arnold, CLU, CFC / Founder
Business Achievers Academy / Canada
Wonderful Joyce,
I love what you wrote there. Some of us that are beginners like me, I am a persistent person, and a very hard worker. But! I have no support to help me, when I have questions putting it all together. I signed up under Brian Finale, and I guess he has no time to bother with my questions.
I have one for you, if you can help me out, I would very much like to dabble in affiliate marketing. But! PPC really scares me, as I am a single mother of 3 and can't afford to get into debt. Are there any affiliates you can make money with that just give you a % of sale without having to pay for people clicking and not buying?
Thankyou, and I wish your Daughter and you every Success.
Sharon Valenta
That was a big lesson for me
Watching that coach know exactly when to reach down and give her a hand. Reminded me so much of network marketing and the expectations some have of their upline.
Sharon - you will be successful, regardless of your upline as YOU want it. You've proven that by asking for help. Way to go.
Joyce
Joyce, what an inspiring
Joyce, what an inspiring article... and a great reminder about branding OURSELVES not the company we work with. I still forget that sometimes :) Bookmarked your article as a reminder.
"A mind once expanded can
"A mind once expanded can never shrink back down
to where it was before"_Emerson
www.JustDoItWithBooks.com
I apologize ...
I'm sorry. My second comment was posted by accident. I tried to "edit" it but there was no "delete" button. Please disregard. Thank you!
Love it!
It is amazing how many things we learn from our children and their experiences. Thank you for sharing as it was very inspiring!
Great Story
I love this comparison Joyce. Kids teach us what we forget as we get older. I had this same experience watching my niece fall down a step, then hesitantly trying it again and again. Each time getting more confident. That can be related to any part of our lives. Thank you for sharing.
Sitting On The Ice
Thanks for the great article and lesson Joyce. You captured the idea that I wish people would understand when I say that leaders don't exist to "serve" their downline.
Like the coach, we instruct and advise. Then, when necessary, we give the little nudge needed to accomplish something that our team member may not be able to do on their own.
Never Quit
Great story Joyce...your daughter is an inspiration to all! We should all take note of your words and keep moving forward, never back.
wow, i liked this post, made
wow, i liked this post, made my jaw dropped on used your daughters skating lesson and compared it to mlm :)
wow, i liked this post, made
wow, i liked this post, made my jaw dropped on how you used your daughters skating lesson and compared it to mlm :)
oops i posted my comment
oops i posted my comment twice sorry
Yours Is A True Story Of Love!
And a wonderful comparison to MLM! What an inspiration to all of us! This would make a lot of us be more grateful and practice more humility instead of complaining and griping how our days are going!
Great Reminder!
Nothing like a real life analogy to graphically illustrate a point!
We need to take responsibility for ourselves in our online business, and indeed in life. Our upline or coach is not there to do it for us. They are there to give the little prod to get us back on the track with something when we veer off.
Thanks for the reminder.