Personal Accountability - 'How To Gain TRUE Feelings of Self-Worth, Confidence, and Accomplishment'
“Assuming ownership and taking full accountability for everything that happens to and for you, for everything that is now present in your life, and for everything you say and do from here on out is the key to totally and completely redirecting the course of your life.
If you continue blaming everyone and everything else for the condition of YOUR life, then you are leaving change up to chance. And chances are, no one and nothing else is going to give you what you are so desperately wishing for.
By becoming fully accountable and taking complete ownership, under every circumstance, you are leaving change up to choice... YOUR choice!” - Charles Hubner
Now it's been quite some time since I've submitted content here on BN, so I thought what better topic to discuss than PERSONAL ACCOUNTABILITY!?
It is the one thing that can and will absolutely transform anyone's life, including yours, into something better, something great. Starting TODAY. Starting RIGHT NOW. Starting from this VERY MOMENT.
Personal Accountability Defined...
People normally associate accountability with accepting fault or blame, or with justifying their actions to another person for something they did or didn't do.
But it is much deeper than this.
This isn't about anyone else.
This is about YOU.
I was first inspired to write on this topic while out with some friends in Silicon Valley, California.
We, along with a crowd of other people witnessed a police officer choking and beating a young woman we had met earlier in the night.
I jumped in to help her, but found myself fighting 5 other officers.
On my own.
Everyone just stood there watching.
In the end, her bloody, lifeless body, was beaten and stepped on by a few of the officers present.
I had bruises on my arms from blocking an assault of batons, guns pointed at me, and threatened with murder if I didn't stop trying to help who they thought was my girlfriend.
And she wasn't taken to a hospital, she was taken to jail.
You probably have a few questions at this point.
Well, I'll answer this one..
“In a crowd full of people, why were you the only one who tried to help???”
I'm a man who holds himself accountable to taking action where others won't but clearly need to.
It didn't matter to me the potential consequence of going up against men with guns who had no reservation about beating a woman who was already unconscious.
I didn't care about the outcome.
I just knew if I hadn't tried to help, I wouldn't be okay with myself when I looked in the mirror the next morning.
Now I'm not trying to say you're going to find yourself in this situation facing the same decision I was.
But I am trying to make a strong point about personal accountability.
Most of the onlookers that night expressed their satisfaction with the action I took and were congratulating me.
Which shows me they all THOUGHT about what they should have done, but didn't ACT on it.
Because they weren't holding themselves accountable to what was happening before their good conscience.
They were waiting for someone else to be accountable.
And just like those people standing by and holding someone else accountable to take necessary action, most people stand on the side lines of their own lives, watching the destruction unfold as they wait for someone else to take action FOR them.
Are you one of these people?
Do you stand by, watch, and wait for someone to show up and do what you should be doing yourself?
The first step in taking control over ANY situation you find yourself in, is to assume ownership over that situation and acknowledge personal accountability - Regardless of who you believe is responsible for you being there.
Do not EVER make someone else accountable for what you're experiencing. Even if their actions are partly or fully responsible for it. If you do, then by default, you make them accountable for CHANGING your experience. And no one has the ultimate power OR the willingness to change your experience but YOU.
It's An Epidemic!
Children wait for their parents to give them what they want as opposed to figuring out how to get it on their own.
Students rely on their teachers to PROPERLY educate them, rather than seek out how to properly educate THEMSELVES.
Men and women hold the other accountable for their happiness and unhappiness, instead of acknowledging their emotional state is entirely up to THEM.
Countless wives hold their husbands accountable for giving them the life they want instead of actively doing what is necessary to create something for themselves.
Players hold their coaches accountable for giving them the training they need in order to perform rather than discovering new and innovative ways in tandem with their coaching to help themselves and their fellow players excel.
Employees hold their employers accountable for the amount of work and pay they get, rather than stepping up and making themselves more valuable, then stepping forward with new ideas to increase their work AND their pay.
Patients hold their doctors accountable for healing them, rather than accepting the truth that the power to heal is within us all. And that most doctors are nothing more than licensed drug dealers.
Citizens hold their governments accountable for providing jobs, higher living standards, and “bringing home the troops”, rather than taking the lead to CREATE and TAKE what the government is NEVER going give them.
Its All About YOU
The reason most people avoid being personally accountable is because they are driven by a primarily competitive mindset, rather than a creative and cooperative one.
There is a prevailing attitude of, “Why should I be the one to...?”
They are conditioned to believe that it actually matters who was initially responsible or who is at "fault or to blame". At the end of all the blame and fault finding, someone still has to step up, take ownership, and create a new and better outcome.
May as well be you ;)
If you take the lead in this area by skipping the fault finding, you will save yourself and countless others, hours, days, even years of wasted time that could have been invested into overcoming new and bigger challenges.
People with competitive tendencies could never be fully accountable or come to an accurate understanding of this, because blame and fault finding, victimism and entitlement, and a deep rooted desire for approval and recognition are some of the many necessary deficiencies for maintaining a competitive mindset.
I suggest you shake YOUR tendency to compete (if you have one), and let the magic power of personal accountability influence everything you think, say, and do.
Once you come to the awareness that you are fully accountable to yourself, you will accept the truth that you are fully accountable to sharing the best you have in you with life around you, rather than expecting life around you to share its best with YOU.
I found that as my own awareness expands and my understanding of self in relation to the world around me evolves, I discover more and more how being personally accountable for everything I say and do (and don't do), as well as taking ownership for every moment I find myself a part of, is the core foundation of all of my achievement, AND my lack of achievement with myself, the people around me, and my business.
Becoming 100% accountable is what has enabled me to rise above disease, desperation, and competitiveness. And maintain an extremely powerful influence over myself, the people I engage, and the challenges that unfold before me.
NOTHING that is being taught to you by the Better Networker community, or any other community for that matter, will have any value for your life or business on its own. Personal accountability is at the core of all information designed to positively improve your life or business experience when applied.
Some Vital Things Personal Accountability Will Do For You
- Help you put an end to complaining
- Help minimize procrastination
- Eliminate the need to conform
- Make you more conscious of what is put in your mind and body
- Cause you to take responsibility when you become aware it was you and not “the other person”
- You wont feel the need to make excuses or feel obligated to justify your actions
- You'll stop asking others questions like, "Why were you late?" or "Why did you do what you did?" (Expecting someone to justify their actions is simply an attempt at exercising power or control over that person. Think school teachers, parents, employers)
- Allow you to take immediate control over ANY situation
- Motivate you to be on time for personal and professional engagements
- Keep even the smallest commitments to yourself and others
- Prevent you from making commitments you know you wont be able to keep
- Cause you to save at least 10% of all your income
- Contribute more to your family, friends, and neighbors
- Eliminate your concern with the latest “celebrity” gossip
- Give you the courage to say “yes”
- Give you the courage to say “no”
- Give you the courage to make decisions quickly and own the consequences of those decisions whether you're happy with them or not
- Allow you to be more appreciative of the things people do for you
- Allow you to be more creative
- Enable you to love, respect, and accept yourself more
- Inspire you to be more persistent and unrelenting when it comes to the pursuit of your goals
- It will aid you in the creation and pursuit of new goals after a new one has been reached, instead of partying and relaxing because you've “earned it”
- Sever the chains of limitation that come with “obeying” the mostly ignorant and harmful rules & policies designed to conform and control you
- Make it apparent that you are guided and governed by a higher principle than the average man or woman
Personal Accountability Opens The Door To Greatness!
There is greatness within us all.
But this greatness will not begin to awaken until you begin to acknowledge yourself as a sovereign being, who is by obedience or rebellion, fully accountable for EVERYTHING you think, don't think, say, don't say, do, don't do, experience, don't experience, are, aren't, have, and don't have..
Accountability to Personal Vision led Steve Jobs of Apple to act only on the most brilliant of ideas that were born in the workshop of his imagination so that you, me, and countless others, in the past, present, and future to come, could enjoy more unlimited, more connected, and more inspired lives through the use of the iPhone, iPad, and other various technological devices many of us can't seem to live without.
Accountability to Personal Service led me to become an Instructor for the Better Networker community despite my very full (and at times overwhelming) personal and business life and commit myself to developing consistent content for its members. Starting with this very article you are now reading (and no doubt benefiting from ;)
Accountability to Personal Dreams led Michael Jackson to dedicate his short life to working tirelessly at spreading a message of unconditional love without judgment, and of cooperative peace between all peoples in a language we didn't have to learn to understand: His genre-less music and awe-inspiring dance moves.
Accepting The Challenge
Here is my challenge to you..
For the next 7 days, force yourself to hold you accountable for everything that happens TO you and FOR you.
Don't judge any situation you find yourself in as negative or positive. Simply acknowledge and accept it.
Then ask yourself, "How can I take ownership and make a contribution to the best possible outcome for everyone involved?” Or simply, “What can I do to create a better outcome or result?"
By taking to heart and mind what I've laid out for you here instead of just moving on to the next thing, a whole new world of possibilites will open up to you.
Thank you for your time, attention, and for holding yourself accountable to reading this article all the way through ;)
P.S. I obviously didn't have the time or space to put everything I would have liked into this lesson on personal accountability. And you didn't open this article to read a book. So if you have any unanswered questions regarding this topic, anything you would like to add, or even challenge, please do so in the comment section below.