“The Aladdin Factor” — Ask for What You Want in Life

I came across this simple strategy referred to as “The Aladdin Factor” by the authors of  Chicken Soup for the Soul.    Simply ask for what you want in life whether it be for help,  an idea,  a raise, or whatever. In turn, the  person you are asking will thank you for requesting their help. Giving them the opportunity to feel good for assisting you.

Ask for What You Want in Life

Easier said then done, right? Right!

I wouldn’t dare ask for what I wanted in life. Why? One answer: FEAR.  The fear of offending someone. The fear of being perceived as too new to the game to waste their time on me.

I know I am not the only one facing this issue.  I would like to give you some insight that helped me start to overcome all my fears.

Why Don’t We Ask?

Through my personal development readings, I realized that we all suffer from some sort of  fear.  Those that learn to let  it go are the ones that became successful.

We do not ask because we worry about the outcome.  We are afraid of rejection. We may be guilty of allowing a past negative response stop us dead in our tracks.  We let fear cloud our present opportunities.

Not some but all fearful thoughts are useless.  Absolutely zip, zero, nada of any use.  They erode at our hopes, dreams, desires and progress. Paralyzing our creative thinking.

Fearful thoughts appear in many disguises that will trick you into thinking they are realistic and reasonable.  For example, “I am being careful, so I am taking my time.”  Sounds reasonable; however, here is the fearful thought behind that statement — “I cannot proceed as quickly as I desire because I am afraid of  failure.”

These fearful thoughts are just explanations and excuses on why something shouldn’t or can’t work.  The negative power we allow these fears give justification for quitting or for not even trying in the first place.

The solution:  Change our thinking habits.  Sounds simple enough; however, just like any bad habit, it takes work to break the cycle.  I suggest that we all make a commitment that can change our lives forever.

Over the next month, consciously ignore and push out any fearful thoughts that enters your mind. When they return, and they will, gently and firmly push them out again.  It will take courage and practice to overcome this bad habit; however, the rewards are great! As time goes by, this practice will be easier.   You will discover how much fun and easier life becomes without the influence of fearful thoughts.

Don’t be Selfish, Spread the Love

While planning out my goals, I realized that one of my own greatest assets was my willingness to help others. Lending a hand whenever the need arose. When it comes to family, I am the first to volunteer. Whenever possible, within reason, I’m there to help. It feels wonderful to be needed.

So by not asking for help are we being selfish to assume that others are not willing to help? I am not the only nice gal in the world.  Never did it cross my mind that, for the most part, people do want to help.  They, too,  have a deep and important human necessity — to be needed and wanted .

Asking for what you want in life benefits not only you but also the person you are asking.   You obtain the knowledge you are seeking and the person asked satisfies their human necessity — feeling good for making a difference. It is a WIN WIN situation.

By asking, I realize I no longer have to do everything myself. I am forming a team, building a relationship with the people I requested help from.

You need to develop these same relationships. Make sure you do not take advantage of your team.  Be willing to help them as well. As Jim Rohn said “You Cannot Succeed By Yourself”. There are plenty of others willing to offer their advice, assistance and expertise. You just need to ask.

Unless you ask, people won’t know you need help. The key is to be sincere in your belief that, deep down, others want to help you.  Approach with your request assuming that the person you are asking is just like you — he or she has an inner longing to be of help.

Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff

Once you remove the fear of asking for what you want, you will instinctively know when and how to ask. This simple insight on human nature and the willingness of others has dramatically speeded up my path to success — as it will yours.

Next time you get a fearful thought about asking for help, remember this.  You are giving a tremendous favor to the person you are asking.  You gave them the opportunity of feeling needed.

Start rubbing your magic lamp, ask for what you want in life, and experiment with “The Aladdin Factor.”