The Art of Conversation

 First rule of telephone conversations with a new prospect:

Get them talking

Second rule of telephone conversations with a new prospect:

Keep them talking

The more they talk, the more useful information you can gather.

Too often, we are more concerned about "telling" than "selling".  The idea of the first interaction with a new prospect is to make them feel comfortable opening up with you and then to find out their "wants" and "needs" and then "why" they have those "wants" and "needs".  

It is not about telling them how great our product is right off the bat - you want to get them talking and then keep them talking.  You then want to listen - but listen intently. There is a difference between "listening" and "hearing". 

The best way to encourage conversation is to ask “open” questions. These types of questions are engagement questions – they create meaningful dialog. 

Ask “HOW” questions rather than “WHY” questions. “How” questions will get you an understanding of the structure of a problem/situation/need whereas “why” questions are more likely to get you justifications and reasons without changing anything.

As people love to talk about themselves, here is one of the best "open" questions you can ever ask:

"What has been your experience with..."

When you ask this question, your prospect turns into a “wisdom provider” rather than an “information provider”. Ask them for their wisdom and you engage them “intellectually” and “emotionally”.

Another fatal mistake many people make is to INTERRUPT! 

This usually happens as a result of the prospect mentioning something particular that you want to come right back on.  Let them finish, but WRITE YOUR THOUGHT DOWN - if you don't, you will probably be thinking of what you want to say (so you don't forget it) and this means that you are not totally focused on what they continue to talk about.  To this end, always have a note pad and pen with you to jot down points to discuss later in the conversation. 

TIP:

After they have finished talking, pause slightly (but not for too long) before you continue. It implies that you consider what they have said to be of sufficient importance to "think about it" (or "consider it").  This will make them feel better about the conversation and show them that you are a considerate person.

Never find things to disagree with them on - if you feel you have to pick them up on something, phrase it in the form of a question - something along the lines of:

"I hear what you are saying, however have you ever considered...?"  

It is less confrontational.  

You actually want to find a few things that you can agree with them on - this will show them that you are "like them" and this will help them take a liking to you, as people trust others who appear more like themselves.

Never use the word "BUT" - remove it from your vocabulary! It is a verbal eraser. You are basically erasing everything they have just said by making it clear that you disagree with them.  Replace "but" with "however" or "and" or "also".

Finally, as I am "The Rapport Guy", I can't end this topic without a tip to help you gain rapport with your prospect - which is of utmost importance early in a new potential relationship.

You need to realize that people digest/absorb what you are saying at the same speed that they talk.  So while they are talking to you, make sure you take note of whether they are talking quickly or slowly, and then adjust your talk speed to meet theirs (you should also match their tone and loudness).  There is no point speaking quickly to a prospect who talks slow as they will not ingest everything that you are saying. Likewise, if you speak to slow to a fast talking prospect, they will find it frustrating. 

Having said all this, there is always the exception to the rule.

Some prospects will talk and talk as if they have "verbal diarrhea". If this is the case, shut them down and move on - you will not have the time to have them in your downline!