Forums

[Dave Kotecki Company: Life Force International Contribution Level: 5]

I appreciate other opinions and different points of view.

It seems to me that a lot of people think that if someone disagrees
with them, or has a differing opinion, they're just "being negative".

In a recent thread, a few mentioned that "negativity" and "bashing" were
going on. It did get a little rough at times, didn't it?

That kind of thing doesn't bother me.
In my opinion, I didn't "bash" anyone.
I don't think I was "negative", either.
Whether anyone else did, or was, I leave to their conscience and your opinion.

What I found interesting is that I started the thread to point out that
someone was "bashing" an event and the attendees, and the post was
completely false.

How did that fact escape those who chimed in and referred to other posters
as "negative", "bashing other people" and "disrespectful"?

This post is NOT meant to start a fight.
I'm truly curious about other people's opinions on "negativity".

Please add your opinion, and if you feel strongly about it, keep the rhetoric
to a minimum as to avoid a verbal slugfest.
Thanks.

[Joyce Penner Company: Life Force International Contribution Level: 8]

The common thread seems to be if you don't agree with me you are negative.

I don't get that. It is only through two opposite points of view being expressed or debated that you can open your mind to the fact you might have some learning to do.

I remember years ago I was struggling with the whole "abortion" topic. I personally would not do it but did it give me the right to say another woman could not? I had what I thought was a healthy discussion with my local postmaster one morning. Some of his points made me think seriously about the direction my thoughts were going. The next morning he apologized. He hoped he hadn't hurt my feelings. He hoped it wouldn't put a taint on our relationship.

Up until that point I was feeling ecstatic that he had broadened my horizons and given me food for thought. And he apologized?!? He had helped me clarify my stance and he was apologizing !

If someone feels you or anyone else is negative if you have an opposing view point I think they are not totally secure with themselves and are feeling attacked. Anyone who's confident and relaxed with themselves will not feel they have to defend their position or their actions or their expressed view point.

We need others to help us grow and I for one appreciate you challenging my view point. If I can't defend it adequately maybe I'm wrong.

Helps me grow,
Joyce

[Dave Kotecki Company: Life Force International Contribution Level: 5]

I don't think that's negative.

It's like the defensive thing.
If you deny something you're accused of, you're being defensive.
If you disagree with me, you're being negative.

[Lilach Bullock Contribution Level: 4]

I find it a shame when people confuse negativity with a differnce of opinion.

Better Networker is a great forum where people can share ideas, support each other, inspire, motivate and also have discussions. There is nothing wrong in having a "healthy discussion" which can then often lead into a debate.

I must admit occassionaly I find myself being careful about what I write when it comes to certain discussions as I don't want to appear negative even if I disagree with the person/people who have written the post.

For example, I have often said that I do believe some people aren't cut out for MLM/Network Marketing. To some people this would be deemed as negative (must never give up etc.!!) whereas I would see my comment as an honest opinion from myself

I think in business we have to be honest and I like to think that the majority of people on here are. If being honest is construed as being negative then so be it!

The world would be a very boring place if we all agreed with each other - as I'm sure Better Networker would be too.

Lilach

[Joyce Penner Company: Life Force International Contribution Level: 8]

I am in a negative mood. If pointing out forum spam is considered negative.
I prefer to think of it as taking a positive step in keeping the forum as useful resource.
I'd rather not have to say anything, but given the increase in spam-like behavior and the inability of admin to moderate it I speak out now and then.

I am always open to being corrected if others feel that they would like to see more blog posts posted in the forums.

Nope Dean you were right on. When someone can't see where they are going wrong someone has to step up and provide the right guidance.

[Art Lovell Contribution Level: 3]

My opinion on on negativity is that this industry so subjective and uber guru driven that what you might consider bullshit, is the next person's pot of gold. So as far as the other thread where another individuals methods were highlighted, I simply believed it could might have been more effective "generalized" rather than specific. I believe you wanted to show that person a better way right?

[Michael B Wilbraham Contribution Level: 4]

It's all really quite simple - "negative" is the opposite of "positive"!

So...if being positive is being upbeat, enthusiastic, agreeable, smiling, frivolous etc, then it must follow that being negative is being down-trodden, un-enthusiastic, scowling, depressed etc

My conclusion is that when someone does not agree with what someone else has said - that it simply not agreeing...it's NOT being negative!

Stay positive, stay inspired!

[Cheryl James Company: Talk Fusion Global Contribution Level: 3]

The only reason that we participate in these forums is to learn from others and provide our opinions.
That will often lead to the perception of negativity if someone does not like what we have to say.

I think it comes down to the words that we choose to convey our message. I try to be careful about how I word my opinion. I try to think as I am writing, will this be interpreted the way that I meant it?

The other thing to consider is uniqueness. Standing out from the crowd usually means that we must do our own thinking. Accepting things without question is usually a result of information overload. When we recognize that we need to take a step back and get grounded again. Besides that, most of the great mentors in this business recommend being controversial as a way to separate yourself from the masses.

I agree with Lilach that if we all agreed on everything, participating in forums would be boring.

Controversy and Excellence together can be a winning combination!

[Rick Lelchuk Contribution Level: 3]

Especially in our industry, we want to insulate ourselves from as much real negativity as possible. It influences the thought patterns and affects people around us. It’s why I don’t watch the news or read a newspaper. I already know what goes on in my town every night and every day, no need to have it assault my senses. (Besides, heaven bless her, my mom will tell me what she thinks I need to know.)

To the point here – as others have stated, is a statement truly negative or merely an opposing point of view? So, like Dave stated originally, am I negative if I don’t agree with you or my opinion differs? If you like steak and I like fish am I negative because I don’t like steak? No, not at all. It is how one chooses to interpret an opposing point of view. Now, if I berate you because you like steak that puts and entirely different spin on the discussion. You may feel the need to defend your position and that might be interpreted as confrontational and negative.

[Joyce Penner Company: Life Force International Contribution Level: 8]

Especially in our industry, we want to insulate ourselves from as much real negativity as possible. It influences the thought patterns and affects people around us. It’s why I don’t watch the news or read a newspaper. I already know what goes on in my town every night and every day, no need to have it assault my senses. (Besides, heaven bless her, my mom will tell me what she thinks I need to know.)

To the point here – as others have stated, is a statement truly negative or merely an opposing point of view? So, like Dave stated originally, am I negative if I don’t agree with you or my opinion differs? If you like steak and I like fish am I negative because I don’t like steak? No, not at all. It is how one chooses to interpret an opposing point of view. Now, if I berate you because you like steak that puts and entirely different spin on the discussion. You may feel the need to defend your position and that might be interpreted as confrontational and negative.

Eating fish sucks !