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[Karen Miller Company: Vitamark International Contribution Level: 2]

Today I read someone's Facebook Status and was taken aback...

Tomorrow will be a great day. I always say "Wait by the riverside and watch the bodies of your enemies flow on by." Tomorrow I will get to see that happen with one of my best friends in the world. This will be totally priceless.

One of the things we learn when doing Personal Development is to learn to Forgive and to Let Go.

Forgiveness is a grieving process. Forgiving doesn't make the hurts go away. Forgiving doesn't make the hurting OK. Forgiving does let us let go and gives us the open door to start changing our behaviors, beliefs and habits we had developed because of how we reacted to the hurts originally.

How do you think holding onto past hurts and vengance affects your success in your business?
If you were working with a partner who was holding onto past hurts and revenge, how would you mentor them?
How do you handle it when one of your partners, or worse, your sponsor, bails out of the business...particularly after you have spent countless hours mentoring and training them?

[Lynda Cromar Company: Empower Network, LLC Contribution Level: 9]

Today I read someone's Facebook Status and was taken aback...

Tomorrow will be a great day. I always say "Wait by the riverside and watch the bodies of your enemies flow on by." Tomorrow I will get to see that happen with one of my best friends in the world. This will be totally priceless.

One of the things we learn when doing Personal Development is to learn to Forgive and to Let Go.

Forgiveness is a grieving process. Forgiving doesn't make the hurts go away. Forgiving doesn't make the hurting OK. Forgiving does let us let go and gives us the open door to start changing our behaviors, beliefs and habits we had developed because of how we reacted to the hurts originally.

How do you think holding onto past hurts and vengance affects your success in your business?
If you were working with a partner who was holding onto past hurts and revenge, how would you mentor them?
How do you handle it when one of your partners, or worse, your sponsor, bails out of the business...particularly after you have spent countless hours mentoring and training them?

Wow there is a lot here and I want to give you the full attention this deserves!
My own feelings is that wanting to see someone be hurt in some way because they hurt you is not only not healthy but very definitely would hold you back from your progress in business.

Like you said when we forgive, it isn't actually as much for the other person as it is for you. Let me explain that as I have had to forgive some huge trespasses against me. If I hung on to the child abuse and rapes that happened to me as a child (no sympathy please, I have dealt with it) I could never have developed int a business leader today. Because I have learned that when you hang onto something someone did to you, you are staying in the past, you are not letting yourself grow beyond that, and you can never be in a place to help anyone else.

No I am not being Religious here but the biblical phrase "vengeance belongs to God" in this case applies. There are ways that those who do harmful things to others will be returned by what measure that they gave. And by that same token must you realize that what you send out you will get back!

When helping a team member with these kind of issues, it depends on how deeply they are intrenched in the hurt of the incident. It may be that only time will heal, but revenge is never the answer.

[Andrea Thornton Company: Global Domains International, Inc Contribution Level: 2]

WOW. I don't think I would want to be one of that person's "best friends"!

Revenge and anger take much more from you than they do from the object of those feelings. He or she is most likely going on about their business without even knowing you are spending that much energy on them.

Andrea

[Karen Miller Company: Vitamark International Contribution Level: 2]

Lynda--

What you said about not forgiving keeps you in the past and keeps you from moving forward is KEY.
I read somewhere once that holding onto the past is keeping us just a fraction of an inch from the next Great thing God (or the Universe) has in store for us.

Andrea--

That is so true...the other person has usually gone on with their lives and don't even think twice about what they did to hurt.

"Don't let people rent space in your head."

[Mario Sanders Company: Life Force International Contribution Level: 6]

When people gets you upset and mad and frustrated, they take the power over you. But when you can see past them, forgive them, and move on, you take back your power!
Revenge only hurts one person, you. Forgive them, then forgive yourself and take back your power!

[Reynaldo Perales Contribution Level: 3]

Peronally...

..my own experience when I started to develop and I thank my sweet mom that got
me started without preaching to me but just talking side by side with her herb and spice
garden is..

We do not change ourselves but people..here is what I am saying..As I develop people were
starting to look different and more harmonious as we pass each other and it puzzled the heck
out of me..When begin to wake up people actually are not like that...

By catching ourselves each thought that are the same that we see in other people is what
make us to understand why people act, do, hurt, etc..All we are doing is waking up little by
little so each moment we are in nothing negative is around us..nothing but love!

Until we learn to understand why people do what they do say what they say is what is..
forgiveness have no value..

Few people realize that other people see them in a different way than they see themselves!

___Rey

[Jim Ticehurst Contribution Level: 4]

Karen quoted:
Tomorrow will be a great day. I always say "Wait by the riverside and watch the bodies of your enemies flow on by." Tomorrow I will get to see that happen with one of my best friends in the world. This will be totally priceless

Karen I think that this is probably one of the best posts that I have read, not because of the actual content in it but because there are so many factors to consider.

Firstly, the picture that it paints, bodies of an enemy floating past, the taste of revenge, the value placed upon bitterness, the value placed upon victory over defeat.

We are all in the picture painting business. What impact would that sentence have made if the author had just said 'tomorrow I am gonna get my own back"?

One of the most famous quotes is the mafia: "Revenge is a dish best served cold' it was taken from: Les Liaisons Dangereuses (1782) by Pierre Choderlos de Laclos. (Dangerous Liaisons)

Is revenge sweet? in America we read regularly of people being execcuted and imprisioned for life, the media does not go into graphic detail but the end result is as bad if not worse than the picture painted that we are talking about here. Does society ever deserve revenge?

When people do us a good deed we want to repay them, that is human nature, why should the reverse be true when somebody does us a bad deed?

Of course, these are only words... thats all....regards jim T.

[samuel arnold Contribution Level: 1]

Seeking revenge is not healthy. God wants us to love our enemies and love one another as you would love yourself. I know that the person, the enemy, in this situation didn't follow what I just said, but you still shouldn't seek revenge. Go out of your way to be kind to that person. It is good for your soul, your heart, and your life. Maybe the enemy will feel bad for what they did and will apologize. If/when they apologize, forgive. You don't have to forget, but always forgive.

[Charles Holmes Company: ViSalus Sciences Contribution Level: 3]

I think revenge is a waste of time. Forgiveness is much more important.

When you are angry, and want revenge, you are letting the other person have complete control over you.

And that's not a good thing. It's a much better idea to forgive them, and move forward.

Besides, it will probably drive the other person crazy, if you forgive them. In many cases, they want you to be angry.

So, learn to let go! You will be a better person because of it.

[Andrea Thornton Company: Global Domains International, Inc Contribution Level: 2]

Jim,

I found out where the quote came from. It is in The Art of War by Sun Tzu. The original author was talking about his enemy, in a time of war - not his friend. I believe the original post was describing something said about someone's "best friend in the world" ? That is the part that struck me the most odd.

Revenge against your enemy - ok, not a great idea but I can understand what might motivate someone toward it. But that kind of hostility toward your friend? Best friend? In the world? ???

We must have a different definition of friend...that person and I.

The reason I say revenge isn't a great idea is because it takes a lot of time and effort. I wasted years of my life being mad at this one and that one for things they don't even remember. Who was angry and bitter and crippled? Me. Even when I "got my own back" I felt bad about it, because never - not once - was that person the only one affected by whatever misfortune that befell them.

One got into a car accident and died - taking a mother and 2 small children in the other vehicle in the process. Every time I thought "I wish he was dead." haunts me.

Andrea